Grape Head

“Listen closely,” the old man said,
“there’s nothing to fear and nothing to dread.
This here tale, which I heard from Fred,
is about the boy they called ‘grape head’.

When Grape was a baby, all could see
his head was green and the size of a pea.
He’d just lay in his crib, silently,
from breakfast time until evening tea.

The scary old woman who lived down the street,
did not believe that young Grape would be sweet.
She’d cackle and curse whenever they’d meet,
then would trip-trap away with a tap of her feet.

Time passed, as it does, and up Grape grew.
Grape’s wee little noggin grew up too.
It was no longer green, but a purplish hue
And was bigger than any I ever knew.

But Grape still was silent, quiet as a mouse.
Whether sitting at school or back at his house.
And the creepy old lady would still grumble and grouse
And would say she was sure that Grape was a louse.

Then it happened one day, out in the sun shine,
Grape was at the bus stop, stop seventy-nine,
When a couple of toughs, who were feeling quite fine,
thought it would be funny to throw Grape a line.

One of the boys, well, he said to his bud,
‘Grape’s noggin, there, doesn’t look so good.
Do you think that he would consider it rude
If the two of us squished it as hard as we could?’

And squish it they did, one on each ear,
pushing on poor Grape, until a tear
rolled down his cheek, it’s true I fear,
and caused the bullies both to cheer.

After the bullies decided to fly
the creepy old woman just happen by
and seeing Grape’s tears, she gave a great sigh
and took out her kerchief and wiped his eyes.

You won’t hardly believe this next part, though,
it is hard to believe, Fred told me so,
but the tear that from Grape’s eye did flow
smelled and tasted just like a fine Merlot."

RIDDLE ME THIS: What did the grape say when it got squished?
ANSWER ME THAT: Nothing. It just let out a little wine.